


psych!

by Ffwydriad



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Drabble, Gen, Humor, Inspired by Psych (TV)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:54:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22580563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ffwydriad/pseuds/Ffwydriad
Summary: Lavorre & Brave: [fake] psychic detectives.
Relationships: Jester Lavorre & Nott
Comments: 1
Kudos: 31





	psych!

“I think I’m gonna start a psychic detective agency!” Jester says, flopping down onto their couch. 

“That sounds like a great idea!” Nott says, grinning widely. 

“That sounds like a horrible idea,” Caleb says, not looking up from the book. 

“Cayyyleb, you’re no fun,” Jester says. “I guess Nott is going to be my psychic detective partner.”

“Yeah, come on, Caleb,” Nott says. “This is definitely one of Jesters better ideas.”

“You still consider Fluffernutter to be your best joint endeavor,” Caleb points out. 

“And?” Jester asks. “That was amazing. And so is being psychic detectives. Name one thing bad about starting a psychic detective agency.”

“You aren’t psychic,” Caleb tells her. 

“You don’t know that!” Nott says. 

“And neither would our clients!” Jester says. “It’s super easy. You just do regular detective work but instead you go ooh vision I’m so psychic and so they don’t ask you any questions.”

“And we’ve already proven that Jester and I are great detectives,” Nott adds. 

“When did we prove that?”

“With the Case of the Missing Donut!” Jester says. “Or when we tracked down your missing laptop, or-“

“Or with all the jewelry that was going missing from Pumat’s shop!” Nott adds. 

“That was you, schatz.”

“And? We solved the case,” Nott says triumphantly. 

“Ooh! And we could always ask you for help! And you can do the thing you do!”

“The thing I do.”

“You know! Where you close your eyes and focus a bit and you explain like everything ever. You’re, like, basically psychic anyways.”

“I’m not going to be part of your psychic detective agency, Jester.”

“Of course not!” Jester says. “You’d be really bad at it. But you’d be super good to bring in to actually solve the crimes while Nott and I distract people.”

“This is sounding like a better plan every minute,” Nott says. “Nott & Jester, Psychic Detectives.”

“No, like,” Jester says, “Lavorre and Brave, that’s way fancier.”

“Brave and Lavorre?” Nott tries. “Nope. You’re right. Lavorre and Brave. That sounds perfect, doesn’t it Caleb?”

“I am not going to bail you out of jail when these shenanigans get you arrested,” Caleb says. 

“Would you break us out of jail?” Nott asks. 

“We’re not going to get arrested, Caleb,” Jester says. “We’re solving crimes, not committing them. This time.”

It takes five hours for Caleb to get the phone call from the Trostenwald Sheriff’s Office. 

**Author's Note:**

> jester: hey so caleb we accidentally solved a crime so good that we got arrested  
> caleb: ...do you need me to bail you out of jail. again?  
> jester: no we're good i'm pretty sure they believe we're psychic so they're having us solve a crime  
> caleb: and you called me why?  
> jester: so that you could hang out and be psychic detectives with us! also, the two detectives who arrested us are really hot. one's this super rugged half orc, and one's this badass human with an undercut and they're so-  
> caleb: i'm hanging up now. 
> 
> i'm @malaismere on tumblr, feel free to talk w/ me about anything


End file.
